Pants or a Dress--Don't Get Confused, Clever Devil, "Millions of Years", A More Sure Sign, Older God Good Too, Lucy & Ida Phonies, Stars to the Ground, If I Only Had a...Heart, King Kong, Can't We All Just Get Along?, Can't You Just Shut Up, Another False Christ, Agrippa, No-So-Sincere Seekers, Miracles, Fools and Their Folly, Creation, the Flood, Lights, Jesus' Priestly and Royal Lineage, Most Critiqued Book, Careful What You Say, Shellfish & Wool Blends, Homosexuality, Patriarchal Bible...

Response to Comment:  "How can a grown man aged 36-40 not feel a bit silly believing in a talking snake and an invisible dragon called Satan who's roaming planet Earth?"

I'm not a grown man, but thanks for asking. 

Here is what Henry M. Morris had to say about the serpent: 

Lucifer’s “heart was lifted up” because of his beauty and he corrupted his wisdom by reason of his brightness (Ezekiel 28:17). Though God had assured him that He had created him, he somehow began to doubt God’s word and deceived himself into thinking he himself could become God. “… I will be like the Most High,” he said in his heart (Isaiah 14:14), evidently thinking that he and God were similar beings and that, therefore, he might lead a successful rebellion and overthrow Him. Perhaps, he may have reasoned, neither he nor God was really “created,” but all of the angels, as well as God Himself, had just arisen by some natural process from the primeval chaos. All had somehow developed (or “evolved”) out of prior materials and it was only an accident of priority of time that placed him, with all his wisdom and beauty, beneath God in the angelic hierarchy.
Lest anyone should express surprise or doubt that Satan might ever conceive such an absurd notion, he should remember that exactly the same absurdity (namely, that this complex universe has arisen by natural processes from the primeval chaos, that the universe is a self-existing, self-sustaining, self-developing entity, and that man is “god”) is believed and taught as solemn fact by most of the world’s intellectual leaders even today! Satan is evidently the “deceiver of the whole world” (Revelation 12:9) and has apparently deceived himself most of all, believing in all seriousness that he can exalt his own “throne above the stars of God” (Isaiah 14:13). Many other angels, possibly a third of them, followed him in his rebellion (Revelation 12:4, 9).
Because “iniquity was found in him” (Ezekiel 28:15), Satan fell “as lightning falls from heaven” (Luke 10:18). God “cast him to the ground” (Ezekiel 28:17) and ultimately he will be “brought down to hell” (Isaiah 14:15; Matthew 25:41).
It may well be possible also that one of the factors that generated Satan’s resentment against God was God’s plan for mankind. People were to be uniquely “in the image and likeness of God,” and also were to be able to reproduce their own kind, neither of which blessings was shared by Lucifer or the angels. This may be the reason why God cast Satan to the earth, instead of sending him immediately to the lake of fire, to enable him to tempt man to fall as he himself had fallen.
Perhaps he believed that, by capturing man’s dominion and affection, along with the allegiance of his own angels, he might even yet be able to ascend back to heaven and dethrone God. Thus Lucifer, the “day-star,” became Satan, the “adversary,” or “accuser,” opposing and calumniating God and all His purposes. And now he became “that old serpent,” entering into the body of this “most clever” of all the “beasts of the field” in order to approach Eve with his evil solicitations.
Demonic spirits evidently have the ability, under certain conditions, to indwell or “possess” either human bodies or animal bodies (Luke 8:33); and Satan on this occasion chose the serpent as the one most suitable for his purposes. There has been much speculation as to whether the serpent originally was able to stand upright (the Hebrew word, nachash, some maintain, originally meant “shining, upright creature”). This idea is possibly supported by the later curse (Genesis 3:14), dooming the serpent to crawl on its belly “eating” dust, and perhaps also by those structures in the snake’s skeleton which have been interpreted by evolutionists as “vestigial” limbs.
There is also the unsolved question as to whether some of the Edenic animals, especially the serpent, may have originally had the ability to converse with man in some way. There is now, of course, a great gulf between the barks and grunts of animals and the intelligent, abstract, symbolic speech of man. On one occasion, God did, as it were, “open” the vocal organs of an animal, when He allowed Balaam’s ass to speak (Numbers 22:28). Some modern zoologists are now claiming the ability to teach chimpanzees a rudimentary form of speech.
On the other hand, it may simply be that Eve, in her innocence, did not yet know that the animals around her in Eden were incapable of speaking and so was not alarmed when the serpent spoke to her. One’s interpretation of this occurrence, in the complete absence of any further Scriptural explanation or amplification, may depend on the degree of his subconscious commitment to uniformitarianism.
Apart from uniformitarian considerations, there may really be no reason why we should not assume that, in the original creation, the serpent was a beautiful, upright animal with the ability to speak and converse with human beings. Such an interpretation would at least make the verses in this passage easier to understand, even though it may make them harder to believe. The fact that great physiological changes took place in both the plant and animal kingdoms at the time of the curse, as well as in man himself, is obvious from Genesis 3:14–19, and it is obvious also that changes of such degree are quite within the capabilities of God to produce.
In cases of doubtful meanings of Scripture, one must not be dogmatic; but, at the same time, he should not forget the cardinal rule of interpretation; the Bible was written to be understood, by commoner as well as scholar. Therefore it should normally be taken literally unless the context both indicates a nonliteral meaning and also makes it clear what the true meaning is intended to be.
It is at least possible (as well as the most natural reading) that the higher animals could originally communicate directly with man, who was their master. These were possibly the same as the animals to whom Adam gave names, and over whom man was to exercise friendly dominion.
It is further possible that all these animals (other than the birds) were quadrupeds, except the serpent, who had the remarkable ability, with a strong vertebral skeleton supported by small limbs, to rear and hold himself erect when talking with Adam or Eve. After the temptation and fall, God altered the vocal equipment of the animals, including the structure of the speech centers in their brains. He did this in order to place a still greater barrier between men and animals and to prevent further use of their bodies by demonic spirits to deceive men again in this fashion. The body of the serpent, in addition, was altered even further by eliminating his ability to stand erect, eye-to-eye with man as it were.
Again it should be emphasized that the above interpretation is not intended dogmatically. The Bible is not explicit on these matters and such explanations no doubt are hard to accept by the “modern mind.” Nevertheless, they are not impossible or unreasonable in the context of the original creation and, indeed, appear to follow directly from the most natural and literal reading of the passage.
In any case, the approach of Satan (through the serpent) to the woman was a masterpiece of effective subtlety. Catching her when she was alone, without Adam to counsel and warn her, probably one day when she was admiring the beautiful fruit trees in the garden, he first insinuated something which neither she nor Adam had even imagined before, namely, that it was possible for a creature to question God’s Word, “Yea, hath God said?” In other words, “Did God really say such a thing as that!” Note the slightly mocking superior condescension to Eve’s “naive” acceptance of God’s command, a technique followed by Satan and his human emissaries with great success ever since.
This first suggestion that God could be questioned was accompanied by an inference that God was not quite as good and loving as they had thought. “He has not allowed you to eat the fruit of every tree, has He? Why do you suppose He is withholding something from you like that?”
If one studies each situation closely enough, he will find that sin always begins by questioning either the Word of God or the goodness of God, or both. This is the age-old lie of Satan, the lie with which he deceived himself in the first place, and which succeeded so well with our first parents that he has used it ever since.
Morris, Henry M.: The Genesis Record : A Scientific and Devotional Commentary on the Book of Beginnings. Grand Rapids, MI : Baker Books, 1976, S. 107

Response to Comment:  "[G]od who wrote a book 13 billion years later."

I am a young earth creationist.  The earth is between 6000-10000 years old.

Response to Comment:  "There's nothing in the Bible that man couldn't have come up with. Show us different."

Fulfilled prophecy.  (See 100 Prophecies Fulfilled by Jesus).  Man can't even predict the weather.

Response to Comment:  "[T]he Old Testament [is perverse and wicked]."

The God of the Old Testament is the God of the New Testament.  He is loving, good and just.

Response to Comment: "[The] heart is an organ for pumping blood around the body. Modern medical knowledge can be fun to learn."

"The heart" is also defined as follows:

3     a      personality, disposition 〈a cold heart
     b      obs intellect
4           the emotional or moral as distinguished from the intellectual nature: as
     a      generous disposition compassion 〈a leader with heart
     b      love, affections 〈won her heart
     c      courage, ardor 〈never lost heart
5           one’s innermost character, feelings, or inclinations 〈knew it in his heart〉 〈a man after my own heart
6     a      the central or innermost part center
     b      the essential or most vital part of something
     c      the younger central compact part of a leafy rosette (as a head of lettuce) —at heart in essence basically, essentiallyby heart by rote or from memory —to heart with deep concern
part participle
Merriam-Webster, Inc: Merriam-Webster's Collegiate Dictionary. Eleventh ed. Springfield, Mass. : Merriam-Webster, Inc., 2003

For our purposes here it would suffice to say that the bible says "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?"  (Jer 17:9).

Response to Comment: "Do you think this guy is Jesus? [link] I don't believe he's the son of God...He...has thousands of people backing him up, thousands of eye witness testimonies, people who genuinely feel he is Jesus and who have written about him.  But, he's not divine, and the followers are deluded."

There will be many false christs (2 Jn 7).  You don't copy something of no value.  You copy what is valuable.

Response to Comment: "[I]t's tough to accept [Jesus] was divine, if he did indeed exist.  The passage of time doesn't make something more true."

First century believers could have corrected any tall tales forming after Jesus' death, burial and resurrection.  The could have refuted his claims of deity.  They did not.  They came to believe that he was the Messiah.  They died for their beliefs.   

Response to Comment:  "[W]e [have dug] up a human fossil older than 10,000 years."

The body parts of a fossilized monkey and human were put together to form "Lucy".  The latest supposed link between monkey and man "Ida" contains "bones of this lemur.  [It's]hardly even a monkey let alone an ape (See:  "Ida").

Response to Comment:   "And it waxed great, even to the host of heaven; and it cast down some of the host and of the stars to the ground, and stamped upon them [Dan. 8:10]."

This statement is admittedly difficult to interpret. I think that the natural interpretation is that Antiochus challenged God and was permitted to capture Jerusalem and the temple. This warfare included the spiritual realm where angels and demons were involved. Some of the feats attributed to Antiochus are astounding; if they are true, demonic power was exhibited.
McGee, J. Vernon: Thru the Bible Commentary. electronic ed. Nashville : Thomas Nelson, 1997, c1981, S. 3:580

Response to Comment: "It wouldn't be rational to believe the events from King Kong."

King Kong is a work of fiction.  The bible is a work of non-fiction.  The creator of King Kong does not claim divine inspiration.

Response to Comment:  "Do you want theists and atheists to tolerate each other or not?  Most people here would defend your right to believe anything you want.  You just can't keep it to yourself though, so we'll respond with words when it comes into our lives."

Theists and atheists should tolerate each other.  But a Christian would be negligent if he failed to warn his neighbor of a coming destruction.  We call "keeping it to yourself" apathy.  If you care about your neighbor, you warn him if he is in trouble.  If a big flood were coming, for example, you would warn others to get into a boat.  In Noah's day, 8 people survived.  The last days will be just like Noah's day (Mt 24:37).

Response to Comment:  "Most here did consider the possibility of a God existing, and had to really think about it with an open mind before moving to the atheist position."

As long as you are still breathing, it's not too late to consider the claims of Christ.  God has only one question for you:  "What will you do with my Son?"  No one is beyond hope.  "For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Ro 5:6-8, NKJV)."

The apostle Paul did his very best to convince King Agrippa of the claims of Christ.  Agrippa "almost" believed (Ac 26:28).  McGee said of this passage:  "Friend, do you know that you can almost be a Christian and then be lost for time and eternity?"  Don't let that happen.

If you have open mind consider that you have hurt the Lord and others in your live.  "[Y]ou will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. I will be found by you, says the Lord (Je 29:13-14)." 

Response to Comment:  "[W]hat took place at the death on the cross was that payment (a propitiation). Jesus lived the perfect life that neither you, nor I could live...]  This really sounds weird. Could you break it down more? Explain it further?"

Sure, what part are you sincerely concerned about? (1 Pet 3:15). 

Response to Comment:  "[B]ased on what you say, there's absolutely nothing that has happened in natural life that helps me to understand what you mean here. Talk to your God and get back with us on this, please. There's no evidence of miracles that I have experienced in my life..."

Would a miracle make all the difference?  In the bible, when God performed a miracle, people hated him even more (Lk 16:31).   

Response to Comment:  "SerpentDove, I'm still pretty confused as to how you decided that the Bible was inspired and the Qur'an is perverse. I assume you came to both with an open mind, with no preconceptions, read through them both and then determined which was inspired by a God?  Please explain to me, without linking to some other site, the process you personally used to make this determination."

Mohammed was a rapist pedophile who heard voices from demons.  He believed that he heard the word of God.  Mohammed was rejected by authentic church members.  Reading the Koran myself convinced me that it is a false work.  Witnessing the fruits of the Islam faith has further demonstrated that it is perverse.  Mohammed wished to be accepted by Jews and Christians.  When he wasn't, he changed his prayer position from that of Jerusalem to Mecca. 

Response to Comment:  "And then explain how your process for deciding which religious text to believe [and why it ] is better than the average Muslim's process for deciding which religious text to believe."

I learned that the Koran has demonstrable errors.  It is also a hateful book.  It encourages it's followers to kill Christians and Jews.  It encourages lying to the infidel.  Because the law is written on our hearts, we know that these things are wrong (Ro 2:15).  I came to believe that the bible is in fact, the inspired inerrant word of God.  I did not begin to study other religions until becoming a Christian. 

Response to Comment:  "If a number isn't in your response, we'll all know you've just backed down from it. Ok? Here goes.  1) God created all things. God is the father of all things. I could give you four Bible verses off the top of my head that make this indisputable by your own rules-- the Bible (Nehemiah 9:6, Revelation 10:6, Colossians 1:16, Ephesians 3:9-10)."

Thou, even thou, art Lord alone; thou hast made heaven, the heaven of heavens, with all their host, the earth, and all things that are therein, the seas, and all that is therein, and thou preservest them all; and the host of heaven worshippeth thee [Neh. 9:6].
Have you ever stood on the seashore and watched those great waves pound against the rocks? Has it caused you to worship God? Have you had this experience as you stood in a forest? I have walked in the northern woods of Canada—oh, how thrilling it was! The vaulted ceiling of those tall trees was my temple, and I worshiped God. He is the Creator. He made all of those trees. He made the universe.
McGee, J. Vernon: Thru the Bible Commentary. electronic ed. Nashville : Thomas Nelson, 1997, c1981, S. 2:537
And sware by him that liveth for ever and ever, who created heaven, and the things that therein are, and the earth, and the things that therein are, and the sea, and the things which are therein, that there should be time no longer [Rev. 10:5–6].
And the angel whom I saw standing upon the sea and upon the earth lifted up his right hand to heaven, and sware by (in) Him that liveth for ever and ever (into the ages of the ages), who created heaven and the things in it, and the sea and the things in it, that there shall be no longer delay.
This angel makes it clear that he could not be Christ, since he takes an oath by the eternal Creator. He “lifted up his right hand to heaven, and sware”—he took an oath by the eternal Creator—“by Him that liveth for ever and ever.” If he were Christ, he would swear by himself. The writer to the Hebrews says: “For when God made promise to Abraham, because he could swear by no greater, he sware by himself” (Heb. 6:13). God could not swear by anything else because there is none greater than God. The angel swore by another, not by himself, because he is not God, and therefore he is not the Lord Jesus. The Lord Jesus Christ is the eternal God. “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. The same was in the beginning with God” (John 1:1–2). We have this statement from the Lord Jesus Himself. “Jesus said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Before Abraham was, I am” (John 8:58). Christ is the Creator. Listen to John 1:3: “All things were made by him; and without him was not any thing made that was made.” In Colossians 1:16 we read: “For by him were all things created, that are in heaven, and that are in earth, visible and invisible, whether they be thrones, or dominions, or principalities, or powers: all things were created by him, and for him.” The angel takes an oath in the name of Christ who is in heaven; and as Christ’s representative, he claims it all for Christ.
Notice that in my translation I have changed the last part of verse 6 from “that there should be time no longer” to “that there shall be no longer delay.” Actually, it does not mean that there shall be time no longer. Rather, this is the glad announcement from heaven to God’s saints on earth who are in the midst of all this trouble and who wonder how long it will last. The meaning is that now it will be a very brief time until Christ returns. It is a confirmation of the words of Christ in His Olivet Discourse: “And except those days should be shortened, there should no flesh be saved: but for the elect’s sake those days shall be shortened” (Matt. 24:22). The angel is telling the elect that it is not going to be long. He is saying to them, “Don’t worry. He that endures to the end, the same shall be saved.” Why? Because they are sealed, and they are going to make it through the Great Tribulation Period.
This is likewise in answer to the prayers of the martyrs in Revelation 6:10, and also it is the fulfillment of what we call the Lord’s Prayer, “Thy kingdom come” (see Matt. 6:10). The kingdom is coming at this point in time in the Book of Revelation but it does not refer to the time I am writing this. I do not know, and no one on earth knows, whether or not Christ is coming soon.
McGee, J. Vernon: Thru the Bible Commentary. electronic ed. Nashville : Thomas Nelson, 1997, c1981, S. 5:975-976
For by him were all things created, that are in heaven, and that are in earth, visible and invisible, whether they be thrones, or dominions, or principalities, or powers: all things were created by him, and for him [Col. 1:16].
3. “By him were all things created.” If all things were created by Him, that clears up the question of His being a creature or the Creator. The statement that He is the Firstborn of all creation does not mean that He was created, but rather He is the One who did the creating.
There are two kinds of creation, the “visible and invisible.” It is very interesting here to note that he mentions different gradations of rank in spiritual intelligences: thrones, dominions, principalities, powers. There are gradations in the angelic hosts. Other verses in Scripture tell us that there are seraphim and cherubim, and also the archangels. And then there are just the common, everyday, vegetable variety of angels.
In Ephesians we note the fact that our enemy is a spiritual enemy. Satan has a spiritual host that rebelled with him. So there are different gradations of rank among our spiritual enemies, too.
4. It is wonderful to know that all things were created by Him. But there is another truth given to us here: All things were created “for him.”
If you were to go out tonight and look up at the heavens, you would see a number of stars. Have you ever wondered why each star is in its own special position? Why is that star in that part of the heavens? It is in that part of the heavens because that is where Jesus wanted it. Not only did He create all things, but they were created for Him.
One of the most wonderful truths in this connection is that we are told that we are heirs of God and joint-heirs with the Lord Jesus Christ. We have a big hunk of real estate coming to us someday. Maybe He will turn over a whole star to us. I don’t know; I have often wondered. I think we will be very busy in eternity. We will not be earthlings then, but we will be given a new body which is free from gravitation. We will be living in a city called the New Jerusalem. We will be able to travel through God’s vast universe. I don’t know how much of that universe He is going to turn over to us. He made it all, created it out of nothing, and He is going to run it to suit Himself. This is His universe. If you have wondered why a certain tree has a certain kind of leaf, it is because that is the way He wanted it. It was made by Him, and it was made for Him. We are going to enter into that someday: there is an inheritance prepared for us. I have never dwelt upon that very much because I feel that it is rather speculative. But I am sure that all of us wonder what it will be like when we are with Him in eternity. We do know it will be wonderful.
You and I are living down here in tents. Paul calls these bodies of ours just that—tents. He says, “For we know that if our earthly house of this tabernacle were dissolved …” (2 Cor. 5:1). A tabernacle is a tent. This tent will go right back to the ground because the body is to be put into the ground at death. We will have moved out of our tent. He says, “… willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord” (2 Cor. 5:8). When we are absent from these old bodies down here, we will be present with the Lord. We will be at home with Him.
You may be living in a home that cost $500,000. I have news for you: you are actually living in a flabby, old, frail tent—all of us are. But one of these days we will have our glorified bodies, and then we will receive our inheritance! You can have your $500,000 house—you won’t be in it long, anyway. Our new body is for eternity, and we will be at home with Him forever. This is the prospect ahead for the child of God. I’m rather looking forward to it. “All things were created by him, and for him.”
McGee, J. Vernon: Thru the Bible Commentary. electronic ed. Nashville : Thomas Nelson, 1997, c1981, S. 5:339-340
And to make all men see what is the fellowship of the mystery, which from the beginning of the world hath been hid in God, who created all things by Jesus Christ [Eph. 3:8–9].
We are living today in the economy, or the dispensation, or the mystery of the church (the gospel of grace), which from the ages past has been hid in God who created all things. My friend, there are a lot of things God has not told us yet, which is one of the reasons I am anticipating heaven. If you think I don’t know very much now, you are right. When I get to heaven, I am really going to start learning things. Really, God hasn’t told us very much. It’s amazing to think how little He has told us. For example, He never told anybody about that little atom. Nor did He tell anybody that there were diamonds deep in the earth. He has kept a lot of things to Himself. He allows man to make discoveries, but there are some things man can never find out except by revelation. The church was a mystery in that sense.
In verse 8 Paul calls himself “less than the least of all saints”—it is a comparative superlative. Paul always took the place of humility as an apostle. “For I am the least of the apostles, that am not meet to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God” (1 Cor. 15:9). “And I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who hath enabled me, for that he counted me faithful, putting me into the ministry; Who was before a blasphemer, and a persecutor, and injurious: but I obtained mercy, because I did it ignorantly in unbelief” (1 Tim. 1:12–13).
A mighty revolution took place in the life of Paul. He was chosen to preach among the Gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ. How wonderful!
“And to make all men see”—the mystery is not to be argued or debated but is to be preached. And Paul was to make all men see the economy (the dispensation) of the mystery.
To the intent that now unto the principalities and powers in heavenly places might be known by the church the manifold wisdom of God,
According to the eternal purpose which he purposed in Christ Jesus our Lord [Eph. 3:10–11].
Another purpose of the mystery is revealed here. God’s created intelligences are learning something of the wisdom of God through the church. They not only see the love of God displayed and lavished upon us, but the wisdom of God is revealed to His angels.
McGee, J. Vernon: Thru the Bible Commentary. electronic ed. Nashville : Thomas Nelson, 1997, c1981, S. 5:245

Response to Comment:  "[S]omehow, that tricky old devil somehow managed to father a few offspring of his own instead? "Satan is your father not God (Jn 8:44)."

Satan cannot produce offspring.  The passage refers to who owns you.  You are his not the Lord's.  We are children of God or of wrath.  As you cannot be sort of pregnant, you cannot be sort of a Christian. 

Response to Comment:  "I'm sure you're going to say that he's just the father in my mind, right? But doesn't that dispute that all of humanity is made in God's image, too. If we are made in God's image, then why are we sinful? If he made us perfect to begin with, why are we sinful? If God created all things, including us, then he also created sin...um...and us.. thus creating us sinful.  This leads to a sadistic paradox of God...[He] made us flawed, damned us for being flawed and then came to earth, killed himself, demands un-doubting worship while not providing enough evidence to support these claims (which should be easy if you're God. So, either he wants us to doubt, or he's incapable of providing enough proof so we don't) and then damns to everlasting pain anyone that doesn't believe it-- the thing he can't provide enough proof for."

Satan is referred to as "the prince of this world" (Jn 12:31).  Most belong to (or are deceived by) him (Mt 7:14).  Satan has been very good at deceiving most of the world (Re 12:9). 

We have internal testimony (conscience [Ro 2:15]); external testimony (God's workmanship [Ro 1:20]), as well as scripture.  Therefore no man has an excuse (Ro 1:20).   

We are made in God's image and likeness (Jm 3:9).  But we are sinners by nature and by our own action (Ps 51:5).  God is not responsible for sin.  Man is.  God provided a way back to himself if man will humble himself before him.

We were not made flawed.  We were made perfect to live in a perfect world.  Sin changed all that.  Jesus reconciled himself to the world (2 Cor 5:19).  Doubt (or lack of faith) in God is sin.  But God encourages us to reason with him--put him to the test.  "'Come now, and let us reason together,' says the Lord, 'Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall be as wool.' (Is 1:18, NKJV).

God has given all that we need (Jn 17:7) and he proved his love (Ro 5:8).

Response to Comment:  "2) Oh yeah, about proof. You make a pretty wild claim here. "We are encouraged by scripture to " test all things" (Ac 17:11)....Riiiiight. So, I've put a few things to the test, and here is what fail[s]. A) There are not two lights hung in the sky. There is one light and the reflection of one light. Genesis FAIL."

I think you may be referring to Gen 1:15:

Genesis 1:14–19
On the first day of creation, God created and energized the entire universe, the infinite sphere of divine activity and purpose. On the second day, He made the primeval hydrosphere and atmosphere for the terrestrial sphere. On the third day, He made the earth’s lithosphere and plant biosphere. Finally, on the fourth day, He made the astrosphere, the “celestial sphere” of the stars and planets surrounding and illuminating the terrestrial sphere.
On the first day, He had said: “Let there be light!” (Hebrew or). On the fourth day, He said: “Let there be lights” (or light-givers, Hebrew ma-or). Intrinsic light first, then generators of light later, is both the logical and the Biblical order.
The chief purpose of both the light of the first three days and the light-givers of all later days was to “divide the light from the darkness” (verses 4, 18), and this can only mean that the two regimes were essentially identical. The duration of the days and nights was the same in each case, and the directions of light emanation on the earth from space must have been the same in each case.
In other words, light rays were impinging on the earth as it rotated on its axis during the first three days of essentially the same intensities and directions as those which would later emanate from the heavenly bodies to be emplaced on the fourth day. Light was coming during the day as though from the sun and during the night as though from the moon and stars, even though they had not yet been made.
If such a concept sounds strange, let it be remembered that it is as easy for God to create waves of light energy as to create generators to produce such waves. There was no need for such generators except to serve the additional function (after man’s creation) of marking “signs and seasons, days and years.”
It therefore did not take a billion years for the light from a star which is a billion light-years distant from the earth to reach the earth after the star was created. The light-trail from the star was created in transit, as it were, all the way from the star to the earth, three days before the star itself was created! As noted earlier, the universe was created “full-grown” from the beginning; God did not require millions of years to develop it into its intended usable form. The purpose of the heavenly bodies was “to give light upon the earth”; so this is what they did, right from the beginning.
Some have objected to this concept on the basis of evolutionary changes supposedly taking place in the stars. The fact is, however, no one has ever observed such changes taking place. As long as men have been observing the stars, they have always looked as they do now (allowing, of course, for the changes in orientation due to the earth’s rotation, orbital revolution, and axial wobble). The only possible exception of any consequence to this statement might be the novas or supernovas that are occasionally observed in the heavens when stars apparently heat up or explode. Some of these have been observed in galaxies supposedly hundreds of thousands of light-years from the earth; the argument is, therefore, that the stellar event producing the nova or supernova must have taken place the corresponding number of hundreds of thousands of years ago.
This may constitute a minor problem, but there are several possible answers. The tremendous stellar distances commonly cited are obtained only on the basis of a number of very esoteric and questionable assumptions. Geometric methods for measuring such astronomical distances can reach only to about 330 light-years; so any greater distances are uncertain, to say the least. Furthermore, there is no assurance of the uniformity of the speed of light at such tremendous distances. There exist respectable models of relativity and space curvature, for example, which yield light motions such that light would reach the earth even from infinite distances in only a few years. Finally, there is no reason why God could not, if He had so willed, created “pulses” in the trails of some of the light waves created traversing space in the beginning. When such pulses reach the earth, they would then be interpreted as, say, novas, when they were in reality merely created bursts of energy in the light trails connecting with various stars. Though the reason for God doing such a thing is not yet clear, that in itself is no argument against it. God may have reasons for some of His acts of creation which we do not yet understand, and our ignorance is no reason for questioning His purposes. In any case, our uncertainty as to the exact reconciliation of these distant novas with a recent creation of the universe cannot offset the clear Biblical testimony to such recent creation.
The lights were set in “the firmament of heaven,” but this was not the same firmament as formed on the second day. The latter is the “open firmament of heaven” where birds were to fly (verse 20). As noted above, the term “firmament” may apply to any particular region of space, as determined by context. In verse 8, we were told that “God called the firmament Heaven.” Evidently “firmament” is the common term and “heaven” is the formal name for any firmament (or space) which has been designated as a particular sphere of God’s creative or purposive activity.
The fact that both sun and moon are called “light-givers” does not suggest that they are of the same substance. One actually generates light, whereas the other only reflects light; but both “give light” as far as their functions relative to the earth are concerned.
It is interesting that the stars are mentioned as of only minor importance relative to the sun and moon. “He made the stars also.” Even though stars are incomparably bigger than the earth, and many of them even larger than our sun, they are of much simpler structure than the earth. A star is mostly hydrogen and helium, essentially quite simple; whereas the structure of the earth is of great complexity, perfectly and uniquely designed for living creatures. Complexity and organization are much more meaningful measures of significance than mere size!
There is no need to try to correlate this simple record of the making of the stars with various modern theories of stellar and galactic evolution. It is sufficient to note that these are all at best only interesting speculations, none of which is generally accepted and all of which encounter important objections. On the other hand, there is no reason at all (other than naturalistic prejudice) not to believe that the stars were made just as they are now. No one has ever seen a star or galaxy evolve, or change at all.
Since the heavenly bodies were to be used to denote the “seasons” (as well as “days and years”), it is obvious that there were to be distinct seasons through the year, and this implies that the earth’s axis was inclined as it is at present. Although the vapor canopy maintained a warm climate everywhere, there would still have been slight seasonal changes in temperature.
The use of the stars also “for signs” is somewhat more uncertain in meaning. Although various suggestions have been made, the most natural interpretation is that this term has reference to various star groupings which would serve both for easy visual recognition of the advancing days and years and also, by extension, for tokens of the advancing stages of God’s purpose in creation. If so, however, these zodiacal “signs” were soon corrupted into pagan astrology.
The phrase “and it was so” occurs in this passage for the fourth time (out of six) in Genesis 1 (verses 7, 9, 11, 15, 24, 30). The account thus stresses that what God says, He also does. The phrase “and God said” occurs ten times (verses 3, 6, 9, 11, 14, 20, 24, 26, 28, 29). The first seven of these were each followed by a creative command beginning with the imperative word “Let …!”
Finally the work of this fourth day of creation was also summarized by an assertion that God saw it all to be “good.” There was at that time nothing on any of the stars, planets, satellites, or any other heavenly body that was out of place or indicative of conflict or catastrophe in any way.
Morris, Henry M.: The Genesis Record : A Scientific and Devotional Commentary on the Book of Beginnings. Grand Rapids, MI : Baker Books, 1976, S. 64

Response to Comment:  "B) Snakes apparently speak Hebrew. Genesis FAIL."

Cited above.

Response to Comment:  "C) According to the divine blueprints that God gives Noah, a few of every animal on the face of the earth (who are now in walking distance) can survive (without climate control) 40 days and 40 nights. The fish that were in the oceans and rivers also survive the salinity mix and restructuring of habitat. After all creatures including plants are sufficiently destroyed, a dove manages to find an olive branch to bring back and everyone disembarks. All animals make it back to their natural climates despite the fact that with no surviving vegetation there is nothing to eat...but each other. Yet the world repopulates just fine. Genesis FAIL."

Two of every animal boarded the ark.  Young animals of each kind can fit easily with room to spare.  God would have had no problem calming the animals.  If you can create a T-Rex, I suppose you can calm it.  The fish stayed in their habitats for the most part, though many died due to drastic earth changes which resulted. 

Genesis 8:5–12
Securely anchored on the earth again, Noah and the others needed only to wait until the waters receded enough for them to disembark. But this took yet another seven months, so that they were in the Ark slightly over a year—371 days altogether. After 21/2 months, they could see the tops of the nearby lower mountains. Forty days later, Noah released a raven and (seven days later) a dove from the Ark. The dove returned; but the raven, a scavenger bird with no qualms about resting on unclean surfaces, stayed. A week later, Noah sent out the dove again, which returned this time with a fresh olive leaf, indicating that seedlings or cuttings from the hardy olive tree were already beginning to grow again on the mountain sides.
The frequent references to “seven days” in this narrative (7:4; 7:10; 8:10; 8:12) have suggested to some that these were Sabbath Days. However, there was not an even number of weeks between the first of these and the second of these; so this is doubtful.
The narrative is not completely clear on the chronological details, but it does seem most likely that Noah sent out the raven on the 264th day after the onset of the Flood, then the dove on the 271st day. The dove was sent out again, and returned with the olive leaf, on the 278th day.
Morris, Henry M.: The Genesis Record : A Scientific and Devotional Commentary on the Book of Beginnings. Grand Rapids, MI : Baker Books, 1976, S. 209
Genesis 8:15–19
A year and seventeen days earlier, God had said to Noah: “Come thou and all thy house into the ark” (Genesis 7:1). But now He said: “Go forth of the ark, thou and thy wife, and thy sons, and thy son’s wives with thee.” These two commands are not contradictory, but complementary, reminding us of two complementary commands of Christ. First, He said: “Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and 1 will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). This command (all the more meaningful in light of the fact that “rest” was the very meaning of Noah’s prophetic name) is but the, preparation for His great command: “Go ye into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature” (Mark 16:15). The Ark had been like the great sheep-fold, with Christ the door, through whom the sheep “shall go in” to be saved, but also, through whom, they shall “go out, and find pasture” (John 10:9).
The animal occupants, awakened from their long rest in the Ark, were also brought forth and instructed to “breed abundantly” and to “multiply upon the earth.” They and their progeny gradually spread out from Ararat, migrating and multiplying over many generations, until they found environments and biologic communities of plants and other animals suited to their needs. Scripture is clear in insisting that “every beast, every creeping thing, and every fowl, and whatsoever creepeth upon the earth, after their kinds, went forth out of the ark.” All the earth’s present dry-land animals, therefore, are descendants of those that were on the Ark.
In like manner, all the present tribes and nations of men are descended from Noah’s family. “These are the three sons of Noah; and of them was the whole earth overspread” (Genesis 9:19).
As both animals and men later radiated out from Mount Ararat, they found open country ahead of them. They could move east into Asia, west into Europe, south into Africa. Some of their descendants found a land bridge across what is now the Bering Straits into the Americas. Others found a similar land bridge down the Malaysian Straits into New Guinea and perhaps into Australia. Such land bridges are known geologically to have existed during the Ice Age, when there was a considerable lowering of sea level due to the vast amounts of water stored in great ice sheets. Modern computer studies have shown, interestingly, that the geographical center of the earth’s land areas is located within a short distance of Mount Ararat, a “coincidence” that can hardly be other than providential.2
Lack of competition permitted animal populations to multiply very rapidly; so there was much incentive for the different groups to keep pressing forward until they found an ecological niche for which they were more suited than other groups. These conditions (rapid multiplication, small inbreeding populations, rapidly changing environments) were ideal to permit rapid variation to take place in each kind (not evolution, but rather opportunity for the originally created variational potential latent in the genetic system of each kind to become expressed openly in distinct varieties). Consequently, different varieties (or even species, and perhaps genera, in some cases, as arbitrarily defined by modern taxonomists) could rapidly develop and become established in appropriate environments.
Although God had implanted genetic factors for wide-ranging adjustment and variation in each created kind (especially was this true in the case of the “clean” kinds), permitting them to adjust to many different environments, nevertheless this potential variation was limited. Never could one kind change so much that it would become a different kind; “after its kind” was the divine principle. Since the environment was so drastically different after the Flood, there were many kinds of animals, especially those that were highly specialized or unusually large, that found it difficult to adjust. Finally, after a number of generations, these became extinct. Included in this group were the dinosaurs, the pteronodons, the creodonts, the glyptodons, and other bizarre creatures of the past.
Many of these extinctions probably took place during the Ice Age. The sharp change in temperatures following the Flood, occasioned by the precipitation of the vapor canopy that had maintained the greenhouse effect over the world, led to the buildup of great thicknesses of snow and ice near the polar regions. These eventually radiated out in the form of tremendous ice sheets, covering northern Europe and reaching down into the northern third of the United States in this hemisphere. The Ice Age probably lasted several hundred or a thousand years (not several million years, as believed by evolutionary geologists) and undoubtedly had a profound effect on the earth’s animal kinds.
2 Andrew Woods, The Center of the Earth (San Diego: Institute for Creation Research, 1973), 18 pp.
Morris, Henry M.: The Genesis Record : A Scientific and Devotional Commentary on the Book of Beginnings. Grand Rapids, MI : Baker Books, 1976, S. 214

Response to Comment:  "...Ok, I'm bored with this and we are still on the first book.  Let's move on to Jesus and his apparent lack of time-keeping abilities. Matthew 24:34, Matthew 26:64..How about the only way Jesus could have been the savior is if he could trace his linage back through Joseph.  Either the virgin birth is wrong, or the prophesy handed down by God is wrong. Jesus FAIL."

Verily I say unto you, This generation shall not pass, till all these things be fulfilled [Matt. 24:34].
“This generation”—the Greek word can mean race and refer to the nation Israel. Or it could refer to the generation that will be living at the time these predictions come to pass. A generation is reckoned to be about twenty years, and certainly the predicted events of this section will take place in a much briefer time than twenty years. My feeling is that it could refer to either one, but I much prefer the interpretation that it refers to the preservation of the Jewish race. Haman was not able to destroy them, neither was Pharaoh, nor did Hitler succeed in his attempts. And no dictator in our day will be able to exterminate these people—God will see to that.
McGee, J. Vernon: Thru the Bible Commentary. electronic ed. Nashville : Thomas Nelson, 1997, c1981, S. 4:131
Jesus saith unto him, Thou hast said: nevertheless I say unto you, Hereafter shall ye see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of power, and coming in the clouds of heaven [Matt. 26:64].
“Jesus saith unto him, Thou hast said”—this is tantamount to saying, “Yes, you have said who I am.” Jesus claims for Himself the title “Son of man.” Dr. Warfield said that this is the highest title the Lord had. This is a title the prophets used (see Daniel and Ezekiel). It was an epithet of deity. He could have claimed no greater position than to have said He was “the Son of man sitting on the right hand of power, and coming in the clouds of heaven.”
McGee, J. Vernon: Thru the Bible Commentary. electronic ed. Nashville : Thomas Nelson, 1997, c1981, S. 4:2

Response to Comment:  "Hmm.. natural selection and evolution? No. Hate to get caught up on the Noah thing, but again.. a world wide flood? NO.

The tree of life is in actuality a tree of death.  There are not links from species to species.  Darwin himself said if this were the case, his theory would break down.  Darwin hated God due to the loss of his child.  He had to come up with a way to understand the world without God. 

Have you ever been to the Grand Canyon?  It's pretty good evidence for a dramatic flood and its effects.   

Response to Comment:  "The fact of it is, the human mind is created to recognize patterns and make connections...whether they exist or not. You will look at this book and see what you want to see, interpret it ways that twist the words to suit your needs and refuse to read the black and white contradictions. You will always have excuses."

Then we each see what we want to see then do you recognize creation and all of its wonder (Ps 97:6)? 

These supposed "contradictions" are refuted each and every time the critic attacks the bible.  The bible has been critiqued more than any other book and it passes the test.

Who will have excuses and who will submit answers for consideration?

Response to Comment:  "3) Even if God were to exist (and all evidence points otherwise)..."

What evidence?

Response to Comment:  "...[T]he God of the Bible is an utter a-*%@!...."

Finally, an honest statement.  You know God exists, you just hate him.  This is why God says that your own thoughts and words will be used to condemn you.  I suggest you through yourself upon the mercy of the court.  Apologize for these words before it's too late. 

The gentile Jesus in the parable of the parable of the ten minas, said:  "'Out of your own mouth I will judge you, you wicked servant (Lk 19:22, NKJV, Mt 12:37).'"

Response to Comment:  "...Murder, rape, human sacrifices, domestic violence, abuse and every conceivable abomination is perfectly ok..."

Where does God say murder, rape, human sacrifices, domestic violence and abuse is ok?  Liberals believe this, not God.

Response to Comment:  "...but eating shellfish, having sex with a consenting adult of the same gender and wearing a cotton-spandex blend is horrible in the sight of his holy eyes. Give me a break..."

God does not force believers to abstain from shellfish (Col 2:16).  Homosexuality is rebellion and an abomination--consenting perverts or not (See Our Rainbow).  God is not opposed to people wearing certain fabrics.  We have freedom in Christ to wear what we would like.  Have you noticed that pastors are not concerned with wool blends in bible churches?  They are not legalists.  For the most part, they no longer appear in super pious attire.  Rather, the understand that that they are freed from the law because they are found in Christ (Ga 5:22).  The law is for the lawless.   

Response to Comment:  "[E]very inch of your holy book plainly spells out the fact that it was written by male control-freak goat herders 2,000 years ago.. not by an omnipotent being."

The Bible is very pro-women: 

Instances of: Deborah, a judge, prophetess, and military leader, Judg. 4; 5. Mother of Samson, Judg. 13:23. Naomi, Ruth 1; 2; 3:1. Ruth, Ruth 1:4, 14–22, and Ruth 2–4. Hannah, the mother of Samuel, 1 Sam. 1:9–18, 24–28. Widow of Zarephath, who fed Elijah during the famine, 1 Kin. 17:8–24. The Shunammite, who gave hospitality to Elisha, 2 Kin. 4:8–38. Vashti, Esth. 1:11, 12. Esther, Esth. 4:15–17. Mary, Luke 1:26–38. Elisabeth, Luke 1:6, 41–45. Anna, Luke 2:37. The widow who cast her pennies into the treasury, Mark 12:41–44; Luke 21:2–4. Mary and Martha, Mark 14:3–9; Luke 10:42; John 11:5. Mary Magdalene, Mark 16:1; Luke 8:2; John 20:1, 2, 11–16. Pilate’s wife, Matt. 27:19. Dorcas, Acts 9:36. Lydia, Acts 16:14. Priscilla, Acts 18:26. Phebe, Rom. 16:1, 2. Julia, Rom. 16:15. Mary, Rom. 16:6. Lois and Eunice, 2 Tim. 1:5. Philippians, Phil. 4:3.
 
Figurative: Of the church of Christ, Psa. 45:2–15; Gal. 4:26; Rev. 12:1. Of saints, Matt. 25:1–4; 2 Cor. 11:2; Rev. 14:4.
Swanson, James ; Nave, Orville: New Nave's. Oak Harbor : Logos Research Systems, 1994

Response to Comment:  "Give me ONE argument of why your God is real that no other religion can use, and I'll respectfully, enthusiastically engage.  But that's a right you've got to earn, and so far, you are just another net troll (with an oddly appropriate nickname)."

He changed my life thoroughly.  Jesus changes the lives of people every day. 

Cleaning WindowsA few housekeeping items:

Response to Comment:  "I've noticed you've picked through which arguments to answer and which to evade."

I am a student of the bible so I follow its instruction.  "4 Do not answer a fool according to his folly, lest you also be like him.  5 Answer a fool according to his folly, lest he be wise in his own eyes (Pr 26:4-5).  Sometimes a Christian will use verse 4.  Sometimes a Christian will use verse 5. 

Response to Comment:  "[N]ot enough to believe it all (I hate not being able to edit posts in blogs)."

What would you remove?  I've been banned from many atheist's sites (Jn 15:20).  FYI, if I get banned on ThinkAthesit, please join in on the conversation at Atheist QOTD.  I am happy that I have not been thrown off yet.   

SerpentDove Achieves