And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.
For it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done of them in secret.
But all things that are reproved are made manifest by the light: for whatsoever doth make manifest is light [Eph. 5:11–13].
We are to “have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness.” A child of God simply cannot go along with the “works of darkness” as light and darkness cannot mingle in the physical world. For the things done in secret by them are even shameful to speak of. We are not even to talk about them.
Rather, we are to “reprove” or convict them. This does not mean that the believer is to become a reformer. It does mean that by the light of his life he is a rebuke to the works of darkness. Light reveals what the darkness conceals. Darkness is not driven away by preaching at it; darkness is dissipated by the presence of light.
There are too many Christians who take the critical method or the preaching method. They try to correct an unsaved person by saying, “You shouldn’t be doing that.” My friend, that is not the way to approach the darkness. You are to be light. You cannot preach to people about these things. You cannot tell them what to do and not do. I constantly get letters from people who are telling me that I should preach against certain sins. No, my business is to turn on the light of the Word of God—that which God calls right. You see, you are not able to win a person to Christ by lecturing to him and telling him what is wrong. You are not to try to get the unsaved man to change his conduct; he cannot change his conduct. He needs to be born again in order to change. You are not to shake your finger under his nose and say, “Don’t do that. Don’t be a bad boy.” You are to be light, and light will always affect darkness.
I remember a very dear lady in my congregation when I was a pastor in downtown Los Angeles. She was a dominant character, however. She came to me and told me that her husband was unsaved and asked me to remember him in prayer. I did so faithfully. Then she came to me and told me that he was coming to church but would never accept the invitation to receive Christ as his Savior. Then she told me this: “At breakfast I talk to him with tears about receiving Christ. Again at dinner I talk to him and cry.” I got to thinking what it would be like to have two meals a day with a crying woman. So I told her absolutely never to mention the subject to him again. She should fix him the nicest meals possible and be the sweetest person she knew how to be. “Oh,” she said, “that wouldn’t work. We are supposed to witness.” You see, she didn’t really understand what it meant to be a witness. Anyway, she did try the plan. She quit blubbering in his presence, and she stopped lecturing to him. In less than six months that man made a decision for Christ. He had been listening to the wrong preacher before that. She had been preaching to him when she should have been a light. Remember that darkness is not dissipated by lecturing or by preaching. Darkness is dissipated by light.
McGee, J. Vernon: Thru the Bible Commentary. electronic ed. Nashville : Thomas Nelson, 1997, c1981, S. 5:264